Unmuting Our Magic

by Naomi on October 17, 2020

 

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To My daughter, may you never forget you are Magic…

When I was a little girl I knew myself to be magic,
experiencing Life.

I saw it reflected back to me
as I roamed the forests,
watched the twinkle in the stars,
lay on my horses back in the fields,
conducting lightning storms with my fingers,
and in my mother’s eyes.

The natural world seemed to teach me that I belonged.
It reminded me where I came from,
that chaos was divine order
and that the change in seasons were as natural
as taking a breath in and out.

Then, the outer world crept in.

My inner natural and instinctual world became suffocated.

I decided it would be easier if
I pressed mute on my magical world.

I thought it was gone.

Years later, I woke with an intensity
that could compare to that of a hurricane.
I felt the chaos I had long forgotten
beginning to rise in me,
but I didn’t remember at first that it was divine.

I frantically searched for the magic outside myself,
attempting to create a life that would give me a taste
of the immensity I carried,
without ever needing to meet it inside.

One day, at the end of the search outside myself,
I found an experience and a process
that would invite me to unmute myself
and meet myself inside…

At first what came out
were all the things I had wanted to say while on mute,
all the heartbreaking truths that had been buried
and never witnessed by another soul,
about who I had come to know myself to be
while trapped inside a human body
in a world devoid of magic.

What followed were waves of intense awakening in my body,
and an unfurling of a place inside I had long forgotten.

Finally, when the inner storm subsided
and I had honored the elemental voice
that had been longing to come out from behind the double paned glass,
to be embraced.
My life became more than just trying to escape or numb the pain…
I began to remember.

At first it was simply a moment of remembering,
followed by two moments of remembering strung together,
until one day,

I was ready.

I unmuted my magic.

And experienced the beautiful, embodied, intensity of Life again.





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